parody of nonsense

right now

2008-02-29T10:24:00.000-08:00

right now.
this exact moment.
what i feel.
...

nothing.
nothing.
nothing.
...

right now.
this exact moment.
what i wanna say.
...

fuck me.
fuck me.
fuck me.
...

i am nothing.
right now.
this exact moment.
...

fuck me.
...

a confession of a pseudo-romantic boyfriend

2007-12-26T03:36:00.000-08:00

cc,

it's the first sentence that's always the hardest, so i'll just go straight to what i have to say and neglect the intro..

you are my life, my other half. that simple girl that i've always been waiting for. to be more poetic, you are my soul, the bearer of my heart, the bringer of whatever else that's good left in me, my keeper... my perfection. to be even more specific, though redundant, you are my life.

straight to the point. short but i guess that sums it all up.. but,this letter is my confession to you, so to make this a worthwhile read, i'll add a little perk to spice up your mood quite more.

truth be told, that's why this is called a confession letter, im very much looking forwartd to and so excited on marrying you, to have babies and a family of our own. How i wish we could fast forward time and be there at that exact moment... but then again we'd be spoiling all the good memories that we should be carrying, for us to keep on holding on. even the bad ones, the fair and the memories we ought to forget, hold on...

i've asked so many things to him in the past. some he gave, so much he didnt. but i never did ask for someone like you, i never thought or dreamt of having someone like you, but he knows all too well, and i thank him,im grateful it was you.

for years i've searched for happiness and now the search ends here... because you are my happiness, the missing part of my whole. and now that youre here, mine to keep, ill never ever let you go, to hope and prayers that you would be same to me, to reciprocate these feelings i have. dont let go, as i would never to you.. hold on..

yes, hold on..
to love...
to forever...
dont let go...
coz i dont want to be sad no more.

i confess... i love you...
my life...my perfection...my forever.

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eSnips Social DNA

my blog speaking

2007-12-03T08:04:00.000-08:00

refresh please...

i wanna be happy.
bring out the lighter side in me.

restart please...

change background.
let the world know that i am happy.

renew please...

fresh ideas now.
sunshine... no more sunsets.

ctrl+alt+del

blog reboot...

a letter from lolita...

2007-12-03T07:31:00.000-08:00

hello friend...please let me call you such, for i never had one in my life, a real one that is.

my name is lolita or so they've told me. i was an orphan, i am an orphan. they found me one rainy night, sister ophelia...my so called mother, but she prefers madame.

my mother...madame...she gave me comfort, food, clothes, shelter and at the right time...work.

i did some household chores, oh! yes i did it right and i was happy. when i was 9, mother gave me my first dress, it was so beautiful!! we went to uncle charlie's. we chat, cracked some funny jokes. unfortunately, mother has some errand to do and she had to leave, so it was uncle charlie and me, with some awkward instance he grabbed my legs. i didn't move, he touched my breast, i still didn't move. he started kissing me, on my cheek, my lips, to my breast...down to my vagina. i felt some tingling sensation and i thought it was nice at first, not right but nice...until he jabbed his fingers inside me, that was then that it hurt. i felt the need to scream but i didn't, thinking uncle charlie would get mad. this is his gift after all i said to myself. i didn't want him to think that i was disappointed with his gift. but then again, i failed him...i shouted, i cried...like a baby. something...a part of him came throbbing inside me. it is as if he's going to tear me apart... i cried...i cried not of the pain but because i failed him. i was shaking so hard, good thing that uncle charlie comforted me, hugged me and told me everything's going to be alright. i believed him...but he was wrong!

the following day we went to cousin brady. he was a colored guy and at that time i wondered, if we were related, how come we have different skin color? but then again, i was 9.

cousin brady was big, a giant of a man compared to me...so, like uncle charlie, he knew it was just a day past my birthday, and like uncle charlie again, cousin brady gave me the same gift. the same tingling sensation, the usual hurt, the familiar pain, and out came the natural reaction, my screams, my cries... again i failed cousin brady just as i have failed unlce charlie...and like uncle charlie he gave me comfort, and told me it's all going to be alright... and again i believed him.......i'll try to continue this some other time, mother is coming...

quotations

2007-11-22T18:47:00.000-08:00

Gott stellte nicht die Welt, es ist die Welt her, die Gott herstellte.

filler no. 05

2007-11-01T00:32:00.000-07:00

love...
like candy..
so sweet..

love...
like a pair of soft slippers..
comforting..

love...
like candy..like a pair of slippers..
they never last..

anybody..
somebody..
tell me i am wrong..
dare me..

please tell me i am wrong...

untitled

2007-10-23T01:22:00.001-07:00

my anger suppressed
take a whiff, puff
that's how i manifest

days so sullen
nights are dismal
my mind is reeling
let my body crawl

kiss the darkness
wander in my dreams
take my whole being
i won't scream

my revenge is coming
it won't be seen
i assure you in this battle
i will win.

-j... akong uyab.

something only our hearts know

2007-08-24T21:33:00.000-07:00

just as everything seems to fall
unknowingly, yet oh, so fortunately
never did they understand the reason why
as if only our hearts know.

just as fate becomes a villain in our lives
unknowingly, yet oh, so thankful
nemesis fate turns her smile upon us
as if our hearts already know.

just as time sweetly passes by
unimaginably,yet oh, so wonderful
never can i define nor to describe
alas, i've no words for this feeling.

...yet, my darling i'm certain...
that our hearts surely know.

S

2007-08-24T07:17:00.000-07:00

i am a superhero
i am no ordinary human
i am a superhuman
beyond mortal
i am immortal
my ability...rephrase that...
my super ability...
to procastinate my way through life
i am unique
i am the master of procastination

i am...

wait...

i'll do this later

Someday

2007-07-11T04:28:00.000-07:00

someday i'll be walking away
one day my feet woould take me elsewhere
i don't know if you'll be there with me
but i think it would be right if i'd ask
would you be there
will you come

because i will surely miss you
i don't know i just don't want to lose you
i don't need such burden

someday i'll be all alone
one day i'll be living on my own
i don't know if we'll meet again or would you even remember my name
but i think it would be great if we keep in touch
would you write
will you call

because i will never forget you
i don't know i just feel empty without you
i don't need such burden

someday i'll be gazing the stars
one day my heart will be longing for your smiles
i don't know if you'll feel it or would you even care
but i think it would be perfect if you're right beside me while you curl your lips

because i'm missing you
and i'll be missing you even more
until i know
until i'm certain
that there won't be any leaving anymore

It's Never Really a Great Love Story Until Someone Actually Dies

2007-05-27T03:40:00.000-07:00

Do you love me?
- yes, and i will love you forever.
How?
- like the sun, never fading...
without doubt, without question
as father time himself...eternal.
Why?
- i know not my love, i cannot explain
i just do...and i am certain.
If I grow old and weak, wil you still love me?
- 'til death...
And beyond??
- forever my love...forever.
And in this afterlife, I'm still yours and you mine?
- yes.
With no other??
- yes... just us.
And so we shall.

BANG!!

Goodbye my love.

BANG!!

Hello my love.

In a Dark Road with Dim Lights

2007-05-27T03:29:00.000-07:00

Im moving fast out of control
Im lost in the middle of no where
where are you now?

should I stop, hitch a ride home...
are you near?
will you be here?

this roadtrip's at it's end...
Im running out of gas, destination unclear
will you be here?

please be here...
'cause this engine is tweaking
and my headlights are fading...

Menage a Trois

2007-05-11T07:22:00.000-07:00

Act I : The solo

Enter Female

Role: Villain
Mistress of Tease

Monologue:
Lubricate Me
Fabricate the mood
Throttle thy fingers
Enter me frontal

Deep Throat

2007-05-11T07:19:00.000-07:00

Enter me deep...
With no hands

Enter me deep...
Visual contact

Enter me deep...
Flicker your tongue

Enter me deep...
Without the teeth

Enter me deeper
Yes, now...

Swallow.

My Succubus

2007-03-24T01:08:00.000-07:00

temptation...
lust...
love...
passion...
obsession...

lure me...
guide me to you

caress...
desecrate my flesh

your stare... poison
your kiss... my death

succumb to you
eternal sleep
forever forgotten

into your realm
i would rest
smiling... content...

they ask why
even i would wonder

but it's just...
just because...

you are my succubus

09276778313

2007-02-23T10:53:00.000-08:00

wa nay cbox pra wa nay lalis...pra way makabasa na lain, pra d mo dako ang poblema...sa nu gpangyaw2x dghan masakitan, wa koy paki pro nay masakitan lain...nahan mo mag yaw2x ari ra nko...bundak na nu kalagot...ari ra nako...dawaton ko na tanan...ari ra nako...

i made my peace...to those who are unsatisfied...to hell...

...

2007-02-17T03:21:00.000-08:00

there are reasons why i never wanted to get involved

this is one of them

R.I.P.

2007-02-17T02:44:00.000-08:00

what monsters we've become...

hurting people, abusing lives

all this...

just because of our own private conflict

what monsters we've become...

we were good people

shame on us...

shame on me...

to my bro:
i never thought it would come to this
what happened...
so stupid of us
we were good people...

extra! extra! extra!

2007-02-15T02:37:00.000-08:00

curtains

2007-02-13T11:13:00.001-08:00

temporarily closed...

.

2007-02-13T10:58:00.000-08:00

tonight i am confused
i feel rage i can barely suppress

haaa....fuck this poem
i am in rage...

no!
i am rage!!!

filler #04

2007-02-13T10:57:00.000-08:00

sometimes i wish i'd be dead
but it seems death ignores me

life must be enjoying
tormented as i am

or maybe it's just me the effortless...

star mart poem

2007-02-13T10:56:00.000-08:00

I suddenly miss coffee at starmart late at nyt
i mis cornbeef and onions that we cook everytime u came by
i miss those NBA games on t.v that i hate to watch
and i surprisingly miss those dirty feet on my bed that needs to be washed
i miss those laughters and the tickles and the things we usually do
but most of all i miss someone so much......
ok I MISS U!

- mai mai

filler #03

2007-02-13T10:46:00.000-08:00

lost...
so near you, yet seems so far

unspoken words
when will i find the courage
a simple touch
grant me the feeling

my conviction
uttered in silence
cast me a smile
im dying

my heart falters
take my hand

come...die with me

Visuals # 01

2007-02-13T04:50:00.000-08:00

someday

2007-02-13T03:45:00.001-08:00

someday - nina

resort

2007-02-12T19:10:00.000-08:00

Panglao

2007-02-11T18:27:00.000-08:00

Like the sea
Seeking land
Always going back to shore
Touching…

Like the shore
Waiting calmness
Always welcoming tide
Embracing...

Like the sea
Sweeping corals
Always going back to shore
Sharing...

Like the shore
Waiting what may come
Always welcoming tide
Taking...

Like the sea and the shore
They connect
Brought together
Forever bound

Forever cursed…

-mai mai

pa musik # 3

2007-02-01T09:55:00.000-08:00

yellowcard - my only one

Fairytale

2007-02-01T07:56:00.000-08:00

sky fades, stars disappeared
we lived happily ever after
such fairytales...
what fallacy
it ended in sorrow
the princess and me
we died...

tears fell, heartbeats stopped
the prince kissed the princess
such thoughts...
hopeless romantics
it ended in sorrow
the princess and me
we died...

feelings numbed, emotions spilled
they were meant forever
such fools...
perpetual blindness
it ended in sorrow
the princess... the king of dreams
with black veils of grief
they died...

into the unknown they proceed

if i... would you

2007-01-29T07:38:00.000-08:00

come...
be near me
listen...
every breath i say

if i tell you i am death
would you come with me?

if i tell you i am agony
would you hold my hand?

if i tell you i am pain
would you kiss my lips?

if i tell you i am sadness
would you give your heart?

if i tell you i am nothing
would you be my life?

if...
choose...
is it the end?
or is it the beginning?
the dawn of forever

think...
weight my words
fathom...
every sorrow i bear

pa musik # 2

2007-01-26T07:36:00.000-08:00

blink 182 - what went wrong

paused

2007-01-24T04:28:00.000-08:00

...

i

2006-12-25T02:52:00.000-08:00

No words for tonight
just feelings…
feelings I cannot convey
emotions kept locked
inside a black marble coffin
I am tired, I am restless

No words for tonight
just feelings…
feelings I cannot embrace
I am the undead
human in disguised
I am tired, I am damned

No words for tonight
just feelings…
feelings I cannot control
overflowing now
a rush of anger a drop of lust
I am tired, I am evil

No words for tonight
just feelings…
feelings I will surrender
take my heart
keep it hidden from me
I am tired, I am lost

No words for tonight
just feelings…
feelings I need to destroy
forget, erase, delete
to care is to die
I am tired, I am weak

No words for tonight
just feelings…
feelings I will not have
not for you, not for me, not for anyone
I walk alone
I am tired… I am.

the bitchy's code

2006-12-25T02:50:00.000-08:00

So to you who kept me sane and afloat
During my bout with
depression. Who untiringly
prays for my wretched
soul. Who calmly accepts
the constant verbal
counteroffensives I throw
your way. Who keeps up
with all the madness I
bring into your
life. And for
all the
wonderful
things you
just brought
into mine. I
thank you.

filler #02

2006-12-21T01:22:00.000-08:00

i wanna put you into poetry
i can't...
make you a song
still can't...
i just stare at you and im at lost
in content...
happy...
i am complete...

imagine

2006-12-14T03:05:00.000-08:00

Imagine there's no heaven
It's easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people

Living for today...

Imagine there's no countries

It isn't hard to do

Nothing to kill or die for

And no religion too

Imagine all the people

Living life in peace...

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will be as one

Imagine no possessions

I wonder if you can

No need for greed or hunger

A brotherhood of man

Imagine all the people

Sharing all the world...

You may say I'm a dreamer

But I'm not the only one

I hope someday you'll join us

And the world will live as one

-John Lennon

pa musik # 1

2006-12-10T07:50:00.000-08:00

pearl jam - alive

filler #01

2006-12-07T08:46:00.000-08:00

this never ending journey to win your heart
it's pointless, crazy and somewhat tiresome
but still i will endure it
and so i stride in agony
for at the end...bliss.

mingaw

2006-12-07T08:44:00.000-08:00

My Pajama Monologue

2006-12-04T07:40:00.000-08:00

i remember the days
the day i wear pj's
wake up with a smile
a kiss on the cheek
warm greetings
hot chocos
the world is my playground
life's so easy back then
my friends always there
love is everywhere

but time really change
wake up with a stress
i miss the kiss
no more greetings
no more chocos
the world turned into hell
life's a mess
a dozen headaches
a thousand heartbreaks

yeah...i miss those days
the day i wore pj's

of me and ignorance...

2006-12-04T07:28:00.000-08:00

who are you? i asked...
no answer...
who are you?

why, dont you know me? he said...
who are you? i asked again...
i am you...he answered

dont you recognize me?
cant you feel?
well, i do, because i am you

we are one and we are many
many? how many?
many...just too many

how? why?
ask yourself...i am the ignorant one
ask hatred, or deceit, ask anger

how about hapiness? joy?
ha! they dont talk
they're asleep...always asleep

do you have a name?
i am ignorance...
i am you in denial

no! you are nothing
yes, that i am too
ignore...deny...

get out of my mind
i will, if only you'd accept
call for acceptance

acceptance??
yes, one of your many
i know him but we've never met

im dreaming...
no, dreams are for the sane
sanity is gone, he left years ago

get out! disappear!!please...
i cant, i am a part of you
only acceptance can vanish me

i dont need acceptance
then here i shall remain
here i stay forever

no, i command you
get out...
dont ever come back

die!! die!!
yes, i will you to die!!
die!! die!!

i cannot die...
i will not die...
just accept...

no, today you die
hmmm...
i cannot die, we are one

your enemy, is it me or you?
do you even know?
do you?? we are one...

...as anger awakens

The Effortless

2006-12-04T07:20:00.000-08:00

i am he the effortless
a recipe i have created
a food that would torture my soul
immobility my specialty
in this sadness for eternity i will remain

outstretched my hand it is to you
begging, pleading
save me from my own demise
trapped in this nothingness
forever silenced

can you see me?
hear me...feel me...
take me away in this uncertainty
insanity, confusion, everything's unclear
save me...can you hear me??

a glimmer of hope, let me see
redemption...
sweet words, shower me
refresh...
cleanse...
heal me...

in this darkness i must prevail
let me dance through the light
it is you i need
my power, my strength
enlightenment...

can you even hear me?

kung wakay lingaw mag in ani sad ka!

2006-12-04T07:15:00.000-08:00

haaayy...
gatambay, gahigda
gatanga
way mabuhat
sige lang ug huna huna
gapaabot makalakaw
mulihok, nusa pa makahunat
dagway murag abat
gasiga mata murag naka tama
ma aan nag adis
di na gyud ikalalis
ang pagka bulay-og ga apaw
imagination ray gadagan
way agi, wa tanan!!
hahay nimo nyor
nusa pa kaha maka amgo
imo gibuhat dili gyud sakto
pisti!! yawa!! atay!!
dong pastilan
haya haya gyud
kinabuhi sa tapulan...

a tale of a twisted mind

2006-11-12T23:08:00.000-08:00

Monday…
Alone…

He decides to go out
Went to a bar
Had fun, been drunk

He thought…
I got to get some chick
Approached a girl
They talked, got along

He asked…
Wanna go home with me?
Girl says yes, they went

He said…
Lets go up to my room
They kissed, they fucked

Tuesday…
Alone…

He woke up without her
Went to the bathroom
Freshened up, got dressed

He thought…
Fuck! I still want more
Saw his sister
He touched, she screamed

She asked…
What the fuck are you doing?!
He says come here, she ran

She said…
Don’t come near me!!
He reached, he stabbed, she died

Tuesday…
Noon…

He undressed his dead sister
Brought her to his room
He had fun, she got fucked

He thought…
I got to tell mom
Called his mother
They talked, she freaked out

She asked…
Why’d you do this??
He says im horny, she ran

She said…
You sick bastard!!
He reached, he stabbed, she died

Tuesday…
Evening…

He undressed his dead mother
Brought her to his room
He had fun, she got fucked

He thought…
I haven’t tried a threesome
He fucked his dead sister
He fucked his dead mother

Wednesday…
Alone…

He decides to kill himself
Loaded a gun
Bang!! Dead.

Thursday…
Police…

They investigate the scene
Went to his room
They searched, found his note

Dear dad,

I never thought I could do this. But I did and I didn’t regret it, mom was still so sexy and my sister’s a fox!! I know you’ve fucked mom and I know you fucked my sister too. That’s the reason I killed you. Goodbye…

P.S. dad’s in the garage…

Your son

s.o.t.

2006-11-12T22:44:00.000-08:00

O> : ey der...

O+ : hu u?

O> : nobody, r u frndly? Ü

O+ : Yeah, but hu r u?werd u get my no.?

O> : jst random luck

O> : wats ur asl? Ü

O+ : Tel me urs 1^st

O> : 21mcbu,u?

O+ : 19fcbu

O> : ic, bisaya mn diay ka, nkay frndster?hehe…asa ka skwela?

O+ : Secret…yup I got frndster, u?

O> : yep, add tka wats ur eadd?

O+ : XXX@y.c urs?

O> : il jst add u up…asa ka rn?wud?

O+ : In my rum, hgda2x lng,u?

O> : hgda2x rpud, u alon?

O+ :Yah,y?u?

O> : alon pud,nkay sun?twagan tka…hahaha

O+ : Haha!wala ko sun

O> : sayng sop nta ta…haha

O+ : Haha…not a fan of sop, beter sa personal

O> : o rily?so wat u werin now? Ü

O+ : Undies lng,alimout mn gud

O> : rily?ur making me horny…hahaha uhmm do u shave?

O+ : Yep,hugaw mn ang filing kng dli gud…y ask?

O> : la lng, turn on mn gud na mg shave

O+ : So ur turnd on ryt now?horny nka?kadali gud

O> : yep,kaw diay?wat makes u horny?

O+ : I rily wana do it in person,dko malingaw sa txt lng or sa fon

O> : ic, so wanna met nlng?tga asa ka?

O+ : Mabolo,ari nlng im alone ryt now…make me horny…hahhaha

O> : 4play sa ta ngari sa txt gud

O+ : D lgi ko mlingaw ana, dako imo?

O> : gud enuf 2 satsfy u…mayo ka mo bj?hehe…

O+ : Jdge it 4 urself, ari lagi…im getting wet 2king bout this

O> : b nko dka ma turn on ug in ani?hahah…imgine nlng na m der bsyd u…licking yr

ears…dwn 2 ur neck..ur collar bone…sa imo breast…nibbling ur nipples…do u have big

breast n pink nipples? Ü

O+ : Hmm….34b…lyt brown lng ako nipples…u gud at licking?? Ü

O> : yah…wer do u want 2 gt likd?

O+ : Haha all over….ahhhh ur makng me hot!

O> : take off ur undies na…il lik ur pussy…

O+ : Ok,beter yet,u take it off 4 me…

O> : ok…il lik ur pussy na….uhmmm….ahhh…take off my pants…giv me a bj…

O+ : Ok….hir it goes…ahhhmmmm…slurrppp

O+ : Fuck!put urs in me na….ahhh…ahhh…uhmm

O> : ok….ahhhmmm…ahhhh….

O+ : Yes!!yes!!ahhh….uhmmm…

O+ : Nagwasan ka?

O> : yep…dat was nice…so asa ka puyo?asa dpit mabolo…

O+ : Kta tas may shwarmahan…txt me il mit u der…

2006-11-05T18:53:00.000-08:00

there's always two sides in everything

the schizo that is me...

2006-11-05T18:42:00.000-08:00

nothing

2006-11-05T18:30:00.000-08:00

And when i hold my breath i think of you
you in me...
how could you miss me?
when i was nothing in your world
yet you remain to be everything in mine
and then i saw my strength ceasing
and im lying on the floor
my body covered with weakness
weakness caused by your pain
and then i become nothing...

- j

the schizo that is me

2006-10-18T08:59:00.000-07:00

im a believer
im a disbeliever

i accept God
i deny God

i dont ask questions
why this?? why that??

i have my faith
why..? why..?

i follow my heart
i follow my mind

i love you
i hate you

i need you,
i dont need you,

let us be forever
get lost!!

i cherish life
i curse life

i savor every moment
fuck it!!

life is beautiful
life sucks

i embrace it
it sucks big time!!

this is me
this is me

im in control...
im in control...

or am i??
yes, i am!!

yet, this is me...
yes, this is me...

2006-10-15T21:15:00.000-07:00

2006-10-15T21:09:00.000-07:00

poetry captured on film...

missing grace

2006-10-12T05:29:00.000-07:00

I thought of you today.
It was not about your betrayal or your ignorance.
Rather, the thought of wishing you're well.
And that life is kinder to you somehow.

I did not wish to dwell on bittersweet memories.
Of childhood simplicity we have once been blessed.
My thoughts led me to a truth we once shared
An honesty only youth can give...only we could.

Remembering what it was like between us
All those nights. All those words. All those dreams.
The world was a cocoon waiting for us to break it.
A cradle we could set fire to and watched it burn.

Instead you heed to the whispers of another vision
You've forsaken us for self righteous prophecies
While you take pleasure in your self imposed normality
You left me to be prey to my own darkness

I reminisce how you always-Always brought me back
From the claws of my turbulent winters and feral suns
And now I embrace both charlatans like an addiction
A perfect hound craving the taste of the red hunt

I thought of you today.
It was not about your judgment and defeat
Rather, the pain of losing you to a path I could not follow.
And the acceptance that I never actually wanted to.

- seerborn

fascination with lines

2006-10-12T05:20:00.000-07:00

I died once. It was uneventful
A blade through the heart
No over rated dramatics
No Romeo to a black Juliet

On that fateful day, my teacher found his prophecy
A man bounded by society's ideals
Yet broken and altered by its truth
Fate has given him the weird of the hunt
Forever marking his dreams; the scent of the kill
Calling, instructing and molding
Strengthening his craving for pain and pleasure
Mocking his flag of honor, morality; his fidelity

I was the source for the rain of blood
Splattering his pure white apparel
As he took respite on a small cataract
From the summons of a hunter god
Instead his providence trapped him in his need
Cornered by curiosity and righteousness

He found my essence flowing in a river of red
Then he remembers his dreams of precognition
And he looks over my dying flesh, knowing his path
Waiting for the ripper before waking me
A canvas for his only masterpiece

I woke up a blank slate. Empty. New.
My master painted me in reds and green
One to remind me of the art of death
The other the impurity of my being
And for a short eternity I was slowly being put together
Every fragment attached to my soul a sacrifice
Every lesson learned was wisdom on mortality's frailty
Every thought was mercy dying inside my mind
And finally, I had to give up my name to a cross
And took another for the truth I have become

I died once. Vile Juliet with blade in her hands.

- seerborn

apple

2006-10-10T09:26:00.000-07:00

i am an apple
at the top of the tree
which gentlemen
dare not climb
afraid of falling
down to the ground

they just wait
til other apples
fall dead below
rotten and straw
or if not
they just reach
for other apples
at the lower branches
to be with them
much easier than me

but there will come
a time of the day
when the perfect one
would come along
and would choose to risk
his life and safety
and take time
to climb the tree
to reach for me

- aryanism

...

2006-10-09T01:53:00.000-07:00

in my dream, i was you and you were God
in existence ive loved you and hated God
but in my dream...
( i hated you beacause i thought it was God )
i loved God because i thought it was you

in existence ive loved you and hated myself
but in my dream...
( i hated you because i thought it was me )
i loved myself because i thought it was you

2006-10-09T01:45:00.000-07:00

parody of unsilence

2006-10-09T01:41:00.000-07:00

love
such a simple word
yet so powerful

your eyes
your stare
mesmerizing

your lips
your smile
captivating

your presence
your whole
to die for

behold as i unveil
the truth
my inner self

no matter how hard
whatever the consequence
hear me as i declare

my parody of unsilence

i love you

she

2006-10-09T01:39:00.000-07:00

She
Lost in the sea of her own thoughts
She wonders if she’ll ever be able to live long enough
Long enough to tell the truth about her
Secrets, fear, and ambitions she’d kept from the whole world
She’d been rejected ones
Tears and pain were the only ones comforting her that time
Dark corners were her only sanctuary
Disappearing from reality was her only hope
There were times she wanted to put things into words
But instead she found a parchment left untouched
An empty page that has been mocking her
A few hours has passed, the empty page now revealed a secret
Not in language but in depiction
Done in black and red
Ink splattered on every corner
Not much of a master piece but it was finally done
Wanting to show the whole world how she felt
But still she was rejected
Shunned aside like she never existed
A shadow from walls was her only companion
She was hurt, neglected twice in her life
She wondered if she’ll ever do the same thing over again
The pain is inevitable but she wanted them to see
To see her, not in shadows but dressed in white that shines when the light hits it just right
The world turned cold on her
Leaving her alone with no one to comfort her
No one to see her dance in her beautiful dress
No one to hear her captivating voice
She did everything for the world
But in exchange she was left alone
To forever wonder the dark corners
Maybe she’ll find something else
A new world perhaps; a world that finally cares
But for the time being; she’ll continue to trek the cold grounds of an empty path

- dmone

why

2006-10-09T01:37:00.000-07:00

why should life be so complicated
why dont we make it simple
like the children for example
when they play in the garden
when they are happy they laugh
if theyre hurt they cry
why cant grown ups do just the same
why do we fool ourselves feeling happy
yet inside we feel pain
why would we hurt someone thinking that
would make us happy in the end
why do we hide our tears, our fears just to feel alright
why do we hide in the shadows where the only answer
is to face the light
why do we always try to deny love
when we always knew we feel it inside
tell me why...

ice candy

2006-10-09T01:31:00.000-07:00

to that stare...
i melt like ice, i burn as i freeze
i bleed of pebbles of salt
and of thorns of purple roses
hurricane of thoughts
withered leaves of memories
they hunt me and stab me
though i walk a cotton path...

- crunchy alugbati

johny

2006-10-09T01:23:00.000-07:00

johny coughed as he smokes his cigarette
catching a glimpse as the moon failed to come out
the air passing by made him shiver
johny was longing for someone to hold him
as he stared at an empty space
he was crying, remembering her
he pulled his guitar and strummed it
reminiscing the past where he dedicated his song

i looked at johny and he was puffing his cigarette
he was adored by many and
he was wearing a pink dress, i thought he was perfect
but now i wondered where he was
johny you know its not the end
the moon came out and the wind came crashing the windows
it's a cold night and i was looking for johny
there he was lying on the floor with a photograph in his hand
it was a picture of her, she could be the one
i looked at myself and i could see johny in me
my heart crashed like an old rocking chair
johny cant really see my heart in despair
it was you johny I adored
it was johny who makes my world go round

the night was dark but i could see the moon shining
the trees were dancing and i saw johny in his pink dress
he stood up and realized he was a big shit
he teared his pink dress and danced in the rain
i could hear the thunder as he said to me
it's all because of you why i am in pain.

-mai mai ako bestfriend

untitled...

2006-10-09T01:18:00.000-07:00

I’m not certain who i am now...
maybe tomorrow...or maybe it was yesterday...
Ive changed and I’m lost...my strength depleted...
my soul left me...my mind in struggle...
only my love is strong...my faith shattered...
i am GOD in my own little world...
save me or be saved by me...
either way we're dead in His eyes...
i am nothing in this world as He is no one in mine...
lay down your heart...be mine...
be my queen coz it is I the king of dreams...

the critique, the poet, the pro...

2006-10-08T06:30:00.000-07:00

effortlessly, your repressed being resonates thru your words.see? what is kept will eventually find it's way to escape. So filart, if you wonder why an online comrade like me seems to know you more than you ever know yourself, it is because i have peeped through your words in ways more than one. remember, an artist should know how to capture the macrocosm of a picture, no matter how minute it may appear to the naked eye. because all of the other four senses are bewitching and at times, deceiving, you have to make use of the remainder. if you want to write, YOU HAVE TO KNOW HOW TO FEEL. i did just that.

as i said, your magic lies on the fact that you have exceptionally vague vocabulary, which is good because your playpen of words wouldn't be limited. synonyms come in varying intensities and though similar in meaning, one word will always sound better than the rest. i wouldn't exactly say you got the influence from the love-themed lyrics of most hardcore rock songs, but i am hearing a lot of The Used and a little of Linkin Park when i read your blog. That's absolutely fine, anyway. In poetry, more often than not, we talk by way of the language we know because our strongest influence is the immediate environment.

your words are deep and heavy. sometimes, you tend to use a lot of metaphors and euphemisms, to the extent that of losing what you really want to convey. the inconsistencies are therefore made clear and it only exposes what you are trying to hide. there's no undo and redo buttons in real life, so please refrain from editing out what isn't good and polishing it by world standards.

you are your own person auggie, and the distinctiveness of your individuality is evident in the words you weave. it's good to note that you embrace avant-garde. this way, you wouldn't be pressured with coming up with the write measures and rhymes. but don't stop midway and take a detour on the safer roads. let the thoughts float freely. write and write until everything has been poured out. afterwhich, you can rearrange the lines to better emphasize the core of your write-up. reread and reread as you revise and as much as possible, limit editing on grammar and the usual subject-verb agreement. you are on the verge of getting there. don't hold it back, never hold it back.

overall, i appreciate your being in touch with your inner self. but you two keep so much secrets together. do not worry filart, in the event that you decide to be true to yourself, the ordinary wouldn't notice it in your writing. poetry is actually a selective medium of communication. it transmits messages only to people who can understand. people who take time to cross the border, to diffuse through the barrier, to fully appreciate the person that is you. you are already on the right track, so keep going. brave orpheus by not turning and looking back. it will be all fine filart, believe me.

A Story,MYD and perfection for example, are particularly honest. you can basically taste the words as you read it. although all the rest were good enough, there are points where you backed off. Your atheist-themed ones lack emphasis because even before you sat down to jot those words, you already had a planned outcome in mind. it should never be like that. I am, You are is bitin. Probably you ran out of connecting ideas. And your poor attempt at blasphemy ended up appearing uneasy. motherfukcin whore is too strong for a word, plus it greatly deviates from the default masculine image of Superman and God in the preceeding stanzas. the gender shift on the last line isn't a good idea, really.

and oh, by the way, the masculine form of whore is stud.

*the above selection is a solicited request from a budding fan (lol. this is my blog, so you practically can't do anything, too bad ^_^). but yes, The Effortless is a review on my friend, Auggie's poetry style. my poetic structure sucks too, but what the hell, he views me as a pro so i better walk the talk.lol

- aryanism
- title changed

you are...i am...

2006-10-08T05:16:00.000-07:00

you are superman
i am your kryptonite
you are darkness
i am your blinding light
you are adam
i am your temptation
you are romeo
i am your poison
you are God
i am nothing

im in your mind
im in your heart
im in your soul

you need me...
i may be your weakness, but i remain to be your whole...

- j

parody of silence

2006-10-07T22:56:00.000-07:00

....
.... . ...... ....
... .. .........
.... ....
.... .....
...........
.... ....
.... .....
...........
.... ........
.... .....
.. ... ...
...... .. . ......
... .....
.. ..... ....
.. ...... ... ....
........ ... ...........
.... .. .. . .......
.. ...... .. .........
. .... ...

tree

2006-10-07T22:53:00.000-07:00

on restless ground i stand anew
like a stubborn seed which suddenly grew
amidst these promises i stand affirmed
like this stubborn seed which turned to a stem
open-eyed and shall no longer be deceived
with this stem which grew some leaves
shallow thoughts now i understand
now the leaves outstretched some bulky branch
all my life now i feel free
like the stem had independently turned to a tree
in this new life ill walk straight and to walk indeed
for this new tree had brought its first seed

the other girlfriend

2006-10-07T13:02:00.000-07:00

she's the bitch. the homewrecker. the one who puts poison to apples. the number two. the substitute. the one people are gushing about. the slut.
enough.
she may be deemed as the bad one, but what the heck, she LOVES him.
it is as simple as that.
because more than being the other woman, she…
WAITS for the "right" time.and HOPES that the "for the mean time lang naman tayong ganito" would be over soon.
STEPS OUT when it's time for her to be with him.and STEPS BACK IN when she's gone.
ABSORBS all the backbites in the world.and ALLOWS herself to be judged.
KEEPS their kilig stories away from the box she shares with friends.and DENIES herself the right of self-_expression.
is OBLIGED not to demand nor get jealousand is almost always AWARE that she has no right to get hurt.
can't even SAY his name in public.
is EXPECTED to understand and adjust and give way.ALL THE TIME
i know.i understand.i feel.
because the other woman is me.

-aryanism

The Surcease of Sorrow

2006-10-07T12:33:00.000-07:00

Do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.
I am the sparkle in the snow.
I am the shredded leaves that blow.
I am the sunlight on growing grain.
I am the gentle summer rain.
I am the quiet bird at night.
Circling about; Taking flight.
So do not stand at my grave and weep.
I am not there, I do not sleep.

-bimbol pero kinopya ni niya gyapon kang Kelly L. Delaney

i am...you are... v. 2.0

2006-10-07T11:32:00.000-07:00

i am superman
you are my lois lane
i am darkness
you are my star
i am adam
you are my eve
i am romeo
you are my juliet
i am God
you are my Goddess

enter my mind
enter my heart
enter my soul

i need you...
you are my existence, you are my whole...

one night stand

2006-10-07T01:37:00.000-07:00

"the most beautiful place in the world,"
you told me,
"is under the sheets."
so we made it ours.
only ours.
you clutched me inside
under a paisley-filled heaven
and above an upholstered cloud.
no word were spoken
only unfinished poetry rhymes
and chords with missing strings.
we let no light pass
just love
or was it not?
i forgot to breathe
as your lips
collided with mine.
so much were already said between them
so much
that to shut up was bliss
and as we closed our eyes
once again
the world was ours.
the warmth lingered
as your whispered promises
danced on the sides of my ear
your hands trekking down
the tiny humps of my spine
your legs locked with my thighs…
and we wonder—
how coffee, books and laughter
had brought us into this world of happiness
that though wrapped in darkness
we saw the light back to ourselves—–
———us.
as one.
i felt your skin brushed with mine
my head was on your shoulder
and before it escaped me
my heart was beating next to yours
the next thing i knew
i was back in the bigger world
and they were asking
where's erik?
to which i asked back
erik who?

-aryanism

poetry in motion

2006-10-07T00:33:00.000-07:00

this is my blog...salamat ni aryanism akng feeling close na miga pro d nko sya type....hahaha....sya gahimo ani pra nko...unya kani na blog pra sa mga tawo hilig ug poems....kng naa moy mga ma share dha...bsig unsa....gugma2x, patay2x, emote2x ug uban pa....share lng email lng nko... shotglass@beer.com ug plihug taronga ug type ha pra d nko mag edit....once agen salamat kang aryanism....hala ka part kadghan na to ha yaw na pang loud....hahahha amen..

p.s. ang d kasabot ug bisaya....sori, just post ur lousy poems....hehhe

para kang c***re

2006-10-06T23:21:00.000-07:00

pare, void!
wa koi mana pare...
stun bai!
sori... di makita ni ngitngit....

wrath zeus!
atay! wa namatay...
mag-vanguard ko part?!
cge! para gahi ka pareha nako...

bai, push nata!
ayaw sa bai... mag-aegis sa ko...
tabang sa tunga cuats!
sa ubos ra ko!

boss... bangaa aning cuatre noh?!
mao jud! 100 imo gi bayranan noob (randyll)
dakua oi! pero cge lang pildi man si cuatre...
bossing: hahaha... ginansiya na sad ko!

- david john delima.. akong migo na sawi

a story of confusion, love and infatuation

2006-10-06T02:24:00.000-07:00

the mind is at lost, when the heart takes charge
like a song in my thoughts, but i cant tend to find the tune
like a poem i know within my soul, but i just cant find the words to write
im at lost, confused, is it because im without you?
i wonder why, yes i wonder why...

has the arrows of love struck me this time
a cut of poison came shivering my spine, left me wounded,
i am the hunted
this mix emotion of love and infatuation, left me asking, have i really fallen
this insane thought and dillusion of us is quite unbearable,
but i will endure it..
just for you, yes only for you...

you haunt me like a ghost in my past
i want to say im missing you but i cant
id like to prove that i want to be with you but i wont
say something, show me a sign, for i want it to be perfect
and i want it to be right
i must ask you to forgive me for this courage that i lack
for though, i may love you as my love would last for eternity
im just afraid, so afraid that you wont love me back...

M.Y.D

2006-10-06T02:23:00.000-07:00

i dream of a place where i can always smile
in that dream i see you, i wonder where the trees are?
the flowers?the people? in that dream i only see you
how can i smile in this place full of nothing except you
maybe God has forgotten me...
i pitited myself, even through dreams i can no longer smile
so i sat down and start to cry
and then you came, and said..."hush it will be alright"
then i smiled, a smile i never thought i had all my life.

my other half...

2006-10-06T02:18:00.000-07:00

My solitary soul seemingly in sorrow
Frazzled.fractionated, fragmented incomplete
Screaming in silence it seeks happiness
And that finally it will forever find
Solemnity,serenity,satisfaction, completeness

Thousands of time i think of the other part of me
Thoughts of it like thunder that thumps me tremendously
Wistfully whispering wondrous words of inquiry
When will it watch my way and be with me as a whole…
Why its absence such an agony to my soul..

In a dumb darkness I descend and plead
Genuflecting to thy good grace that me he will lead
To the undying delightfulness my dreams divulged
Guidance of thy good grace I ask to govern my act
In my search of satisfaction be exact

Just in fantasy this fragment fills me
Entirely It fills my emptiness earnestly
Flames of fulfillment felt by my full being
That encompasses every known epidemic
Which entails to the eradication of life’s exact meaning

At times a trickle of a tear trims down my eye
Terrified that things would turn out a fictitious lie
Sitting staring, a single sound I cannot utter
Standing still, a sole step I cannot manufacture
It’s a sheer shock that shuts me to complete stillness

But no matter how hard the hunt of happiness will be
Upright I’ll rise, unregretful, I’d risk things courageously
Nothing can hinder my heart from holding back my search
For the fragment, the fraction that will fulfill my forlorn soul
Whatever the future holds, contently, willingly I’ll wait,For my love….. my other half…..

-crunchy alugbati

seemingly there...

2006-10-06T02:03:00.000-07:00

in the deepest recesses of my thoughts i was there...my greatest joy was at hand... or so i thought?!i gave her my soul to the bare...but look at the damage it brought...how could i have been so blind not to see...the darkness of my plight...but still my life belongs to me...blue skies, i plead... come on the first crack of light!

-david john delima

untitled...

2006-10-05T04:18:00.000-07:00

i may not be good at words but i know what perfection is...
to be alone with you, to see your face, to smell your warmth,
to feel your touch, to taste your lips, to hear your voice...
a moment of togetherness...you and me oblivious to the world,
in a state of blissfull harmony, exchanging loves, capturinng hearts...
a litany of soft gentle words, a caress to the mind...
sublime for the soul...you and me, PERFECTION...

i am...you are...

2006-10-05T04:10:00.000-07:00

i am superman
you are my kryptonite
i am darkness
you are my light
i am abel
you are my cain
i am romeo
you are my poison
i am God
you are nothing

exit my mind
exit my heart
exit my soul

i dont need you...
you muthafuckin' whore...

walang titulo

2006-10-05T04:06:00.000-07:00

Hoy! halika, mag laro tayo
labas tayo dalhin mo baril ko
ikaw kalaban ako ang bida
papatayin kita sa pagtapon ko ng granada

'wag kang umilag dapat itoy iyong saluhin
hindi dapat sila mabibitin
gusto nila ng madugong patayan
itoy ginagawa nilang katatawanan

Hoy! bata, halika laro tayo
hubarin mo damit ko pati na rin sa iyo
tabi ka sakin at akoy halikan
siguradong itoy kanilang magugustuhan

'wag kang umiyak 'wag ka rin pumikit
para sa kanila itoy sarap at hindi sakit/sakim
humiga ka at iyong saluhin ang sakit kong
nakakahawa
gusto nila itong mangyari sa mga gaya mong
batang sariwa

Hoy! tanda, halika laro tayo
akin na sungkod mo at tumayo ka ng diretso
tanggapin mo aking sipa at malalakas na suntok
ako kunwari ay tao at ikaw ay lamok

hindi ka makakailag dahil ikaw ay mahina
sa mundong ito ang mga kagaya mo ang mawawala
sila na matataas ang may kapangyarihan
pera ang kanilang ginagawang diyos-diyosan

Hoy! halika, laro pa tayo
punta tayo doon sa malayo
ikaw tao ako ang diyos
paparusahan kita ng lubos

sinira mo ang aking nilikha
mananagot ka sakin dahil ako ang Bathala
wala kang karapatan, wala kang alam
ikay hindi diyos, tao ka lamang

Hoy! halika, laro pa tayo...
'wag kang matakot, 'wag kang magtago
laro pa tayo...

untitled...

2006-10-05T04:04:00.000-07:00

i hav nothing left to say or to do...let it be God who guides my footsteps, all this time i thought i can handle things my way, but then again i was wrong...foolishly building my own world, exalting my life to the highest of expectations, desperate, defeated, take my hand....for at this moment i surrender, this life i do not own, this dreams i will not have, this love i will not forsake....i am not perfect that now i know, im just a simple man....just another fragment of God's great masterplan.

star

2006-10-05T03:59:00.000-07:00

Twinkle twinkle little sorrow,
Like the star on that Christmas eve.
Ever guiding, always you would follow,
to light my path through the land of grieve

twinkle twinkle little sadness,
since my time has begun, always with me
the most shining, ever brightness,
my teacher, my master on this art of misery

twinkle twinkle little hatred,
the eldest of all, the first to live,
the beginning, of it all to him it started
whereas all this pain I have received

twinkle twinkle little love,
how I wish you’ll end this strife,
alas, it is a star that I never have,
in this constellation we call life…

parody of nonsense

2006-10-05T03:52:00.000-07:00

theres this one guy i know
a good guy, no, rephrase that
hes a great guy
so great that guy is, hes done
nothing in life
greatness he said is achieved
when you are remembered whilst
youve done nothing at all
ha! you believe that sucker?!
well, maybe he has a point
for one thing, i do remember him
anyways, that guy, that "great" guy
hes just as ordinary as the other guys
hes not great at all
hes a frustrated rock and roll legend
with a conceited thought of being perfect
a hopeless romantic, a poet wanna be
wait a minute...i think that guy is me
lets get back to that guy i know
the "great" one
well this guy, hes all-knowing
a paragon, the avatar of power
omnipotent...omniscient...
but this guy? he doesnt exist, or does he?
hes the self proclaimed way, truth
and life...the beginning, the end
some call him the creator, the father
yeah right?! why dont you call him dad?
yeah, you got me, that guy is God
so maybe this "great" guy that i know
maybe hes a nobody, a nonexistent dude
just a figment of a wild imagination
maybe he is, and ill try to find that out
but 'til then, lets just chill
and so here my story ends
just another parody of nonsense

primero

2006-09-30T11:31:00.000-07:00

done, filart.

u better start harping, will u?

^_^